On Her Majesty's Secret Service
by miniSmack
Summary: *strong language!* a/u A joint fic with Smack. Takes place in a universe when Earth has a princess. And an unhappy one at that. Fate has dealt her an unfortunate turn and her and her lady-in-waiting Jess seek to find a solution to her problems.
1. Introduction

On her majesty's secret service Introduction  
  
Hi guys! Cass (mini) here! I hope you like this story. It's really funny! *nods her head fast * Yup it is! LOL. The story idea came from Jess and I being delirious. To tired to figure out what's really good on in our own minds. It's painfully obvious that we were screwed up when we sat down and started writing. Kami help us all.  
  
Hey everyone! Jess (Smack) here! Me and Cass were really, really bored and decided to write this wonderful story! (That you all really want to read... right?) Cass is right.we were so freakin' screwed up when we wrote this but it's good for a few quick laughs. It might be confusing to follow but do your best. It's rated for foul language.potty mouths! We are potty mouths..anyway.let's start.  
  
Oh yeah. Every other chapter it changes story tellers, between me and jess ( Have fun. 


	2. Chapter 1

On her majesty's secret service  
  
By Cass and Jess  
  
Disclaimer: Umm.dammit.we don't own DBZ. Nor do we own the names of the James Bond movies. *cries *  
  
  
  
'.' ? thoughts  
  
  
  
Oh yeah Mind Entries are like diary entries but recorded in the mind.  
  
  
  
  
  
Mind Entry #1  
  
  
  
  
  
Thoughts. Thoughts raced through my mind. Being princess of Earth was such an annoyance. Over protective parents, they won't ever let me go raving!  
  
"As Princess of Earth, you cannot be seen in a lower class dance club like Secrets!" As my mother once told me. They don't understand how much fun it is. Once I snuck out with my boyfriend Vegeta, a foreign prince. He was here on a peace treaty meeting with his father. I can't believe we actually found time to go out. For a bad boy, he wasn't that terrible of a dancer. Her was passionate, and smooth, a regular playboy. Anyway, back to the thoughts.  
  
At times I wish I could be just run away, to escape the pressures and prison of my everyday life. I feel like I have no freedom. I just want to be normal like everybody else. OK, not everybody is "normal" but everybody is trapped in a "prison" either.  
  
In fact I might escape. There has to be a way.  
  
  
  
Chapter 1 ??License to Kill  
  
  
  
  
  
"Princess Cassandra, time to wake up!" My best friend and lady in waiting Jessie cried. She threw a pillow at me.  
  
  
  
"I'm up, I'm up, I swear I'm up!" I yelled back, shooting straight up in my bed. I threw the curtain to my bed open and stumbled ungracefully to my feet.  
  
  
  
"You're supposed to be a princess. Princesses are graceful. Where's your grace?" She mocked.  
  
  
  
"Ya know what?" She cocked an eyebrow at me. "Die!" I hissed, tossing a pillow back at her. She smacked me in the face with it.  
  
"That's not very princess like!" She chanted. "Is that an order?"  
  
"What would you know? You're not a princess!"  
  
"I know and I'm glad. I can go raving!" Right then and there, was a "royal" pillow fight; feathers flew everywhere. After a while the disturbance caught my father's attention. He cleared his throat, and out of fright we threw a pillow at him.  
  
"Cassandra, Jessica, what in Kami's name are you doing?" We gulped. I just realized how stupid we must have looked. Here we are, two 16 year olds of the royal bloodline covered in feathers, hair all a mess.  
  
"Getting ready for breakfast." I squeaked. He just shook his head, laughing to himself. "I can't believe you left the door open JessJess!"  
  
"I didn't! He opened it! I swear CassCass!" She sighed. "Whatever!"  
  
"Yeah, yeah, sure."  
  
"Come on lets get ready for break.I mean brunch." She got up and left the room, shooting evil glares to the other ladies in waiting who dared chuckle. Jess was my father's mistress' daughter, so technically you can call her my stepsister. We are the same age, but she has an older brother whom I hate. He always seems to have this dopey look in his eyes. It is creepy; he follows me around the castle so I try to keep Jess with me at all times. She is pretty much my bodyguard, my knight in shining armor, but not. (Wait no...that's Vegeta's place).  
  
I got dressed quickly, removed the feathers from my brown hair. Damn Jess and her sarcastic comments. I put my hair up in a new bun, like a proper unmarried maiden should do. I envy Jess. She seems to always bend the rules, letting her light brown hair flow beyond her shoulders. She enjoyed such freedoms. Damn her, and damn the ass that made her.  
  
"Cass, are you OK?" Jessica peered in my room. She had her hair half up and half down and was wearing a beautiful red dress. She looked so much like her mother, so stunning. I feel so ugly around her. I sighed to myself and walked over to her.  
  
"I'm fine Lady Jessica, I was just in deep thought." She smiled and started down the hallway.  
  
"Hurry up, the king has news to tell us."  
  
The huge table was filled with whispers and excited faces. I heard a rumor that my father was going to name the man whom I would be married. Oh Kami, I hope it isn't Jess' brother. Promethious is such a fag. I pictured Vegeta's face in my mind and I forced a smile upon my lips. I had a bad feeling about all of this. 17, Jess' "boyfriend," made a grand entrance, as usual. Honestly! I have no clue what she sees in him! He blew a quick kiss to her and sat down across the table. As he sat he had a grim expression came about his face. Next to arrive was Vegeta. He looked so angry, or was it hurt? It's strange because he never shows emotion, which frustrated me at first. It also surprised me, he never told me he was coming today. Maybe my father will marry me to him, if that's so why does he look so hurt? He took a seat down at the other end of the table by his father. As the guests all were seated my father stood up and everybody went quiet.  
  
"Ladies and gentlemen, I know you all have heard rumors of what was coming today. I would like to announce that a joint wedding has been arranged. My daughter and her main lady in waiting, who is also my stepdaughter are engaged." Jess and I exchanged glances. She looked at 17 with a twinkle in her eye but he wouldn't meet her gaze. Excitement raced through my mind. "The King of Planet Vegeta has agreed to let his youngest son, Vegeta marry my mistress' daughter, Jessica." The whole room gasped. She looked over to me like she was going to cry and puke at the same time. I knew she would never purposely steal my man. I turned my eyes to 17; he too looked as if he would burst into tears. My father continued his death sentence in Jess and my minds. "My only daughter, Cassandra shall be wedded to Prince 17 of the Earth Moon, Lunar." I couldn't hold it in. I started to cry. I practically jumped out of my chair, wanting to run to Vegeta. I caught myself and sent him a look of horror. Jess arose right after I did.  
  
"I hope you're satisfied. For once in my damn life I wish the royal family would take in consideration of what they do to their children!" I screamed. My father looked outraged but being the rude teenagers we are, Jess and I left the dining hall. I heard my father apologize on my behalf. I wasn't sorry! I hated him! I hated them all! 


	3. Chapter 2

On her majesty's secret service  
  
By Cass and Jess  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: Umm.dammit.we don't own DBZ. Nor do we own the names of the James Bond movies. *cries *  
  
  
  
'.' ? thoughts  
  
  
  
Oh yeah Mind Entries are like diary entries but recorded in the mind.  
  
  
  
Mind Entry #2  
  
  
  
OK. I'm somewhere past pissed, Damn fag king. I don't want to marry Vegeta! I want my 17! Doesn't he see the way Cass looks at Vegeta? He is breaking his own daughter's heart! The king's gonna pay! Ill think of something. after all, I'm the brain of this operation! Cass is the looks! She could pass as a Saiyan if she wanted to; all her nice dark brown hair! I'm cursed with my light colored hair! Oh well. wait! I got it! I'm the best! I gotta go tell Cass!  
  
  
  
Chapter 2 ??Tomorrow Never Dies  
  
  
  
I burst in Cassie's room and found her crying on the bed. My Aries attitude took over and I regained my composure. "Quit your bellyaching and listen to me Cass!" I yelled. 'Damn. I got the Saiyan attitude.' She looked up at me and mumbled something that sounded like "go away bitch." I took it as a compliment and continued with my master plan. "You want to marry Vegeta, right?"  
  
  
  
"Duh bitch. That's why I'm crying," she answered unenthusiastically.  
  
  
  
I ignored that comment and continued. "Well, Then let's go to Planet Vegeta!" Cass gave me a "you're-dumber-than-hell-but-I'm-too-pissed-to- care" look and I explained. "There's plenty of ships that go to Planet Vegeta and he's going to have to go back eventually, with or without me." She looked like she was considering it for a moment and then went back to her mournful self.  
  
  
  
"Jess, you know that won't work. It's kinda hard to conceal the princess and her lady in waiting. Everybody probably knows that we're going to try and escape and knowing my father, he probably has extra guards out." She sighed. "It's no use. We're screwed."  
  
  
  
My expression fell. She had a point. But I won't let my master plan, my baby, fail. "True but if we go on one of those midnight flights and charm a few guards." I let it fall and did an impression of my friend. "Hey there big boy. How about me and you go out sometime?"  
  
  
  
Although she tried not to laugh, Cass found a rude remark. "But princess?!? You're getting married!"   
  
  
  
I still I wouldn't give up. "Ah screw you then! Just punch him!"  
  
  
  
"But then I'll break a nail!" She held up her hand and gazed at her perfect nails. "Look at them! They're perfect!"  
  
  
  
Damn her. Stupid beauty queen. "Fine! I'll punch the guy. Geesh...lets just do it!"  
  
  
  
"OK. Let me get my make-up!" She joked.  
  
  
  
"But try not the look so princessy! We don't want to draw too much attention to ourselves." I said.  
  
  
  
"So you want me to put on my dirty stained cloak, and put up my hair in a complete mess like you do everyday?" She had the nerve to say.  
  
  
  
"I don't put my hair up remember?" I replied.  
  
  
  
"Then make it a complete mess?"  
  
  
  
"You know what? Die bitch."  
  
  
  
"You know, sometimes you get on my nerves Jess. Maybe I should fire you." She glanced over at the clock; which read 11:15PM and sighed. She went to her closet and grabbed a cloak.  
  
  
  
"If you did that before I wouldn't be marrying Vegeta, would I"? I replied half-sarcastically, half meaning it.  
  
  
  
"But you know, Jess, I would never fire you. It's hard to get rid of your best friend." She said seriously.  
  
  
  
"Stop paying me and Ill disappear."  
  
  
  
"Oh my Kami Jess! I don't pay you! Stop making stupid remarks and get ready!"  
  
  
  
"Let's wear out cat eats so they'll think we're ambassadors for the cat people!" I exclaimed.  
  
  
  
"I have all the make-up so we can have all the whiskers and everything!" She said in a valley girl voice.  
  
  
  
"You're too creative."  
  
  
  
"Wait...they hate Earth!"  
  
  
  
"Shut the hell up and stop thinking!"  
  
  
  
I have to hand it to Cass. She sure did make us look like the cat people; in only a half hour too. We "packed" and were ready to head out. We tripped over our fake tails and tumbled out of Cassie's room, drawing the attention of the guards. "Hey what was that?"  
  
  
  
"At least we landed on our feet." Cass whispered trying to find the "bright" side. Like there was one. Idiot.  
  
  
  
"Quick run!" I whispered. "And remember grace!"  
  
  
  
"Shut up! I'm gonna kill you, I swear!"  
  
  
  
We ran, well...actually we walked quickly, a power-walk (we found running didn't work so well...tails remember?) down the halls towards the hanger where all the ships were kept. We miraculously managed to lose the guards. "Damn you dad hires dumb guys for guards." I stated the obvious once again.  
  
  
  
"But then again, he hired you." Her smart-ass comments are gonna get her killed one day. Or at least bitch slapped.  
  
  
  
"But that's because my mom's his mistress."  
  
  
  
"But you were my lady in waiting before your mom was my dad's mistress." She said discreetly as we boarded the ship.  
  
  
  
"Shut the fuck up!"  
  
  
  
We looked around the ship. Cassie stopped her gaze on a sign. She mumbled, "Uh oh."  
  
  
  
"What?" I asked. Although there were a lot of big metal things with a lot of buttons, I saw nothing unusual.  
  
  
  
"Do you think all this science-type stuff would be going to Planet Vegeta? Look at the sign."  
  
  
  
"Good point. I looked at the sign she was pointing at. It said "Test Experiment 007" "Oh shit!" 


	4. Chapter 3

On her majesty's secret service  
  
By cass and jess  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: Umm.dammit.we don't own DBZ. Nor do we own the names of the James Bond movies. *cries *  
  
'.' -- thoughts  
  
  
  
Oh yeah Mind Entries are like diary entries but recorded in the mind.  
  
Mind Entry #3  
  
  
  
We warped through space quickly. I was scared, and hungry. What was going to  
  
happen to us? Were we going to die? I played through the recent events in my mind over and over again. How could my father do such a thing? He even knew I liked Vegeta! Why else would I risk my neck for him! It made me cry.  
  
  
  
Jess sleeps through anything, she always looks so peaceful, and nothing ever bothers her. I wish she were the Princess, not me. I wish I were normal.  
  
  
  
Oh no...the computer in beeping again. "Destination: Alternative Life" What the fuck! What kind of experiment in this?  
  
  
  
Chapter 3: A View to Kill  
  
  
  
I decided to wake Jessica up to see if she happen to bring any food. I hope she did, I mean she is the brains of this operation! What kind of leader would let us starve?  
  
  
  
"What the hell do you want moron?" she said sleepily.  
  
  
  
"Did you bring any food, hoe?" I asked.  
  
  
  
"Yeah bitch, but you can't have any!" She laughed. I figured when she tossed me a candy bar that she was kidding. I looked down at the "candy bar" and realized that it was one of those gross power bar things.  
  
  
  
"Ewww! Jess, where'd you get this?"  
  
  
  
"Off one of the gay guards we mugged!"  
  
  
  
"Oh my Kami.We should kill him. Any human who eats these freely deserves to die!" The mainframe of the ship started to beep louder and quicker. We ran over to see if it told us what it was doing. The main screen flashed. "Destination: Complete, Please Take Seats"  
  
  
  
"Shit!" I yelled as I buckled my seat belt.  
  
  
  
"What?"  
  
  
  
"I guess we are in another dimension!" I panicked and my skin went white.  
  
  
  
"Don't be silly Cass! Why would the Earth government spend money on trying to reach a different dimension?"  
  
  
  
"I don't frickin' know!"  
  
  
  
"Clam down and relax. Look, it seems like we are nearing Earth."  
  
  
  
'But is it the Earth we know?' I thought to myself.  
  
  
  
"Why would Earth launch a ship to fly away from Earth and then back?" I questioned.  
  
  
  
"Didn't I tell you to stop thinking?"  
  
  
  
"Ya know what! I hate you! I yelled.  
  
  
  
"Well, I told if ya stop paying me I'd leave!"  
  
  
  
"I'm not paying you cunt!"  
  
  
  
"That's it! No more food!" The ship hit a rough spot and the lights went out. I screamed and unbuckled myself by accident. Just as my luck the ship flipped as my seat belt was no longer holding me in place. I fell forward and hit my head hard on something in front of me. That's the last thing I remember before being knocked out. 


	5. Chapter 4

On Her Majesty's Secret Service  
  
Disclaimer: Umm.dammit.we don't own DBZ. Nor do we own the names of the James Bond movies. *cries *  
  
'.' ? thoughts  
  
Oh yeah Mind Entries are like diary entries but recorded in the mind.  
  
  
  
Mind Entry #5  
  
The crowd hit Jess on the head with a baseball bat. It looked rather painful. I guess I got hit too because I don't remember walking into a dungeon. It smells funny and I see mold in many places. They tied Jess up and gagged her. I kinda pitied her. not. I don't understand why they didn't gag me too?  
  
I wondered where we are. Did I really believe that mumbo jumbo about the dimension change? No! I mustn't! I'm the Princess of Earth, or I was.  
  
Why should I care? I'm normal. I guess. No one here knows my true title and I hope to keep it that way.  
  
Crap, Jess is waking up.  
  
Chapter 5: The Saiyan Would Loved Me  
  
"Jess, are you OK?" I mocked, knowing she couldn't reply. She attempted to kick me. Which made laugh.  
  
"What's so funny?" I jumped. The new voice came from behind me. I turned to face that stranger only to see it was. Vegeta. or was it?  
  
"Oh Vegeta, you scared me!" I cried.  
  
"How do you know me woman?" He bellowed. I took a couple steps back and ran into the wall. This wasn't Vegeta, no mine anyway. "Answer my damn question!" I whimpered.  
  
"I. I. I don't know Prince Vegeta, I must have recognized you face." I murmured. "I'm sorry." I really wasn't, I must have sounded pathetic.  
  
"No one addresses me as Prince! State your name and planet!"  
  
"My name in Princess Cassie and I'm from Earth. at least I thought I was." I drifted off, too scared to speak anymore.  
  
"Princess? Earth never had a Princess! You dare lie to the Prince of the Planet Vegeta!"  
  
"Never! I am from Earth!" I cried. "And I AM a princess!" 'Though I don't care to be.' I thought. Ignoring Vegeta's flaring temper, I untied Jessica. She feel to her feet and almost lunged at he prince, I had to stop her before she got anyway. "Don't make me retie you whore!"  
  
"Shut the fuck up! I've had it up to here this whole thing! We didn't even do anything and we got thrown in jail! What's with this place?"  
  
"Temper, temper!" He laughed and walked away.  
  
"Answer my question you bastard! I want off this crap hole!" She yelled after him. He just snickered.  
  
"you should have kept her tied up. Now she is your problem!" He disappeared into the darkness.  
  
"That's not that bad of an idea." I said quietly to myself.  
  
"If you leave me tied up, how will you get out? I'm the brains remember?"  
  
"I have charm."  
  
"That's because you're a princess, Princess." She muttered. "There's got to be a way out."  
  
"There is." I said plainly.  
  
"What sucking up to the Prince? Yeah right!"  
  
"No! Following his cologne trail out of this pig stile!" I started to walk where Vegeta left. "You coming'?"  
  
"Of course, I'm not staying here! But then what do we do?"  
  
"Try to fit in."  
  
"Like that's gonna work! I already told off the Prince! He hates me now!"  
  
"Sucks for you now doesn't it?"  
  
"Well, you didn't do much better. He thinks you lied to him. Nice way to win a guy over."  
  
"At least I didn't swear at him!"  
  
"Too scared and hurt to probably do so!" She laughed.  
  
"Shut the hell up!" I cried.  
  
"Sorry I forgot how important it is. If it was 17 I'd do the same thing."  
  
"I bet you would bitch!"  
  
"We shouldn't fight with each other. We have enough problems with the World."  
  
"you can say that again."  
  
"I kinda wish I was home, even if I have to marry Vegeta."  
  
"Take that back!" I stopped and turned towards Jess and slapped her.  
  
"I didn't mean stay married to him. There's divorce. We could just divorce both of 'um and remarry. Well. could of."  
  
"Be quiet. Do you know how much scandal that would cause?"  
  
"At least we wouldn't be in a World where everybody hates us and watch the ones we love be assholes. We still shouldn't fight over it. There's nothing we can do about it." I pretended that I didn't care and continued walking. 'I hate it when she is right!' I thought to myself.  
  
We kept walking, even though we had no clue where we were going. We were both, or at least I was, too hurt or angry to talk. Jess had her fist clenched and seemed to generate anger. 'She always does that when she's pissed.' I thought. 'When she is pissed it looks as the whole world is rested on her shoulders.'  
  
"Light." I screamed, pointing towards a flicker of sun in the horizon. I broke out into a run to reach the door. I looked and let out a gasp. 


	6. Chapter 5

On her majesty's secret service  
  
By cass and jess  
  
  
  
Disclaimer: Umm.dammit.we don't own DBZ. Nor do we own the names of the James Bond movies. *cries *  
  
'.' -- thoughts  
  
Oh yeah Mind Entries are like diary entries but recorded in the mind.  
  
Mind Entry #4  
  
The stupid power must have been out for like a half hour or more. Crazy scientists, why didn't they make it better on an off chance that some dumb stow-a-ways decided to ride on an experiment? Why? Oh well. I guess Cass was knocked out. The idiot must have unbuckled herself. Whatever possessed her to do that is beyond me. OK, so we're on a freakin' science experiment ship, have no clue where we're going and she decides to unbuckle herself? Oh well. Like I said: "I'm the brains." The power is back on now. Wahoo! I think we landed! We haven't really moved in a while. I'm gonna "unbuckle" myself (Hope I don't get knocked out) then I'm gonna wake the idiot up.  
  
Chapter 4: From Russia With Love  
  
"Hey dumbass! Wake up! We landed I think!" I yelled at my "partner" in crime.  
  
  
  
"Uhhh. lemme sleep some more mommy." Like I said, the lights are on but no one's home.  
  
"I'm not your mom, idiot! And we better get out so we can figure out what's going on!"  
  
"I told you! We're in another dimension! That's what's going on," She said in her "I-know-more-than-you" voice.  
  
I noticed some people we're peering through the windows and that the beeping stopped. I walked towards the windows and started screaming. "Hey jackasses! Either let us out or go away!  
  
Some people moved away. Good fear me little ones. One of the men in front said, "Hey! Are you guys from Russia!"  
  
"He looks kinda like Kakarott." I said.  
  
"Kakarott, Smackarott! Let's go best him up!" She smiled, and then yelled, "No you idiot! We're from Cuba!"  
  
  
  
"But you might break a nail," I sneered.  
  
"Shut the fuck up.  
  
It took us a while to find the door again; it was open the first time. We decided to get rid of our cat ears, tails, and makeup; we also got rid of the dirty cloaks. They just looked nasty. We had quite the crowd and they wouldn't go away no matter what we taunted them. I think they thought we were stripping. We opened the door after several tries and stepped out into the "new" World.  
  
The group of people backed up once we got out. Cass whispered to me, "Should we introduce ourselves properly or make up names?"  
  
  
  
"I don't know. If we say you're the Princess of Earth they might look at us weird or arrest us. Let's introduces ourselves without the titles." I whispered back.  
  
"Hail Earthlings." She said while holding her hands up to form the peace sign.  
  
Somebody yelled out "Kill 'em both!" The guy who looked like Kakarott said, "No you guys. Lets try and be friends. They could be good people."  
  
Cass couldn't control her laughter. She was on the ground. I managed to get "that's" and "Kakarott" out of the insane chuckling. "Please excuse my friend. It's just that you look and sound a lot like one of our friends," I apologized. I pulled Cass onto her feet and she dusted herself off, still laughing like a psycho.  
  
  
  
"Knock them both out and take them to the castle for questioning." A voice from behind the crowd said. Kami, that sounds a lot like my "fiancée." Ouch. 


	7. Chapter 6

Disclaimer: Umm…dammit…we don't own DBZ. Nor do we own the names of the James Bond movies… *cries * '…' --> thoughts Oh yeah Mind Entries are like diary entries but recorded in the mind. **Mind Entry #6** Kami, I hate fighting with Cass. She always takes it the wrong way. It's like no matter what I do or say it's wrong. We found a light, but where it leads… I just hope it's better than here. Maybe I shouldn't have let my anger control me. Now I'm in deep shit. That's why Vegeta and me would never get along. I should try and control what I say from now on. We're skating on thin ice and I don't want to fall through. We finally reached the light… Chapter 6: Dr. Oh Bitch The light came from an open doorway. There was a gap in between the path and the way to freedom. When we looked below, we saw a river. I was tempted to push Cass off the ledge, but reminded myself that I was suppose to control my actions. "How are we supposed to get across?" I asked even though I knew I'd be the one coming up with the answer. 

(A/N's: Hehe. Cass is making COOKIES!)

"I don't know, Jess, you told me to stop thinking." She said sarcastically. "Not like you do that anyway." I replied with extra sarcasm. "I have all the reason the push you down that edge." She pointed to the river. "Please do. Anything is better than this. Push yourself after." I answered seriously. "I'm all you got, remember?" "Do you really mean anything? If not, then may I assist you ladies in pushing you both off?" and icy male voice said from behind us. I turned to find myself face to face with 17. "Depends on what anything is." I replied coolly. I wasn't going to lose my attitude like Cass. Not yet, anyway. Cass remained quiet as though she wanted to see my reaction. (2nd A/N: Cass is too busy making Cookies, so she'll be quiet for awhile.) 17 looked slightly amused at all the things he could say 'He is acting just like my 17…' I thought. "Will you two accompany me to Prince's Vegeta's ball tonight?" He asked with a smirk. "Both of you." I moved closer, to play with his mind, really. I put my finger on his chest, looked into his eyes and said, "Are you telling me that a guy as handsome and charming as yourself doesn't have a date." Cass stifled a chuckle. He looked a little uneasy, (I guess he wasn't expecting that answer) and responded, "On the contrary, I didn't want to pass up this rare opportunity. Here you are, two beautiful girls, plotting suicide and me, undecided on a date." Cass speaks up on my behalf, "We would love to accompany you. But… we don't have the proper attire to do so." I mumbled under my breath "And we aren't exactly liked by the prince…" If 17 heard me he pretended not to. "Is that so? That won't do at all," he answered. "I can provide the clothes if you provide the entertainment and date." I blushed. "What kind of entertainment?" I asked uncertain of what to expect. 'This is so my 17…' "I don't know. Conversation or perhaps some dancing? If you have any suggestion I'd love to know them." Cass took over the reply, because my utter embarrassment. "We have to get out of here first." "That's easy enough. Follow me ladies. Whether or not you agree, I can not leave you here." He told us. "We agree." We said at the same time. He walked right over to the "gap" and told us that it was but an illusion. He led us to the entrance of the dungeon and took us to some spare rooms. He got our sizes and left us alone to think and wait. He he'd send to dresses and pick us up around 7. 


	8. Chapter 7

Disclaimer: Umm…dammit…we don't own DBZ. Nor do we own the names of the James Bond movies… *cries * '…' --> thoughts Oh yeah Mind Entries are like diary entries but recorded in the mind. **Mind Entry #7** (Cass: mmmm…. Cookies…) (Jess: Cookies are good *raises eyebrows *) (Cass: Anyway.) 17 sent me this beautiful pale yellow gown; my favorite color. Jess got a pretty dark blue dress with light blue sparkles throughout it. I couldn't help think what his real motives are. I mean he helped us escape, gave us rooms, and nice dresses. 17 was never **this** generous! Something is defiantly up! At least Jess didn't freak about 17 like I did Vegeta. Both of us took showers (long, hot ones) and put our hair semi-up, for that classy "I'm a good girl" look. For once I looked almost equal to Jess' beauty. 17 showed up to bring us at 7 sharp later that night. Here, we're going to see all our friends and family, but they aren't. Maybe… we'll see ourselves. **Chapter 7: Liar Liar Pants on Fire!** The three of us climbed into a limousine. It was so … so… BIG! The limousines back home weren't as large as this one. '17 must be pretty important.' I thought. "So, you two ladies look very nice tonight!" He commented. I ignored him and stared out the window. The other two carried on small conversations, Jess giggling half the time. Just like old times. I always hated going places alone with them; I always was forgotten. Oh well. We arrived on the scene, each at 17 sides. I spotted Vegeta, wearing a very sharp looking black tuxedo, looking hot. He froze when he saw us, with a look of utter disgust upon his face… wait! He always looks like that! I watched as an "enchanting" young lady glided across the wooden dance floor, with more grace than I can ever possess, heading towards us. "Good evening 17, I see you couldn't find a date that you didn't have to pay." She sneered looking down her nose at us. Jess started to say something but I beat her too it. "Excuse me, and you are?" I said with my "princessey" tone, glaring evilly at her. "Me? I'm the Princes personal priestess. And you? Haven't I seen you on some street corner?" "More like personal hoe" Jess mumbled. The priestess shot her a look that cold kill a yak from 200 yards away. Jess seemed unfazed. 17 stayed quiet. Seemly quite amused with the "entertainment" we're providing him. "Not that I remember Miss Priestess." I made sure I put "priestess" in finger quotes, and winked at her. "But I did see you, what was it a dollar?" "No, No, 50 cents is all she can get." Jess whispered. Suddenly the bottom of Jess' dress caught on fire, and the priestess snickered with contentment. 17 started running around like an idiot screaming "Put it out! Put it out!" like the fire was on him. I grabbed a glass of clear liquid from the tale nearby and threw it at dress thinking it was water. It erupted into bigger flames and Jess cried "That's vodka! You moron!" "I thought it was water!" I cried back. 17 stopped running around in circles and fainted on the spot. What a pansy. "I smell vodka! I know vodka when I smell it! And that's vodka! Now someone get me some **water**!" A glass bowl flew from a table and dumped on her, water pouring on everyone close. The fire went out and we realized the room was staring at us. 17 was still past out and the priestess was missing in action. 


End file.
